Anet Margot Ris-Kelman

Love for Anet Ris-Kelman,

The life of this amazing human intertwined closely with mine for several years, during college and afterward. We were good at having adventures together – backpacking, swimming in forbidden waters, building dance floors, improvising, performing, discovering somatic secrets. At times I felt myself to be her protector. Other times I found her exasperating and naïve, and forgot how much I loved her.

For the past several years our exchanges were only sporadic. Last we communicated a few months ago, she seemed to be doing well. She’d always gone thru times of being mentally distraught, which took various forms. But like I said, she seemed well when last we emailed. I loved her. And I know she admired me a whole lot.

Her dad was a scientist who pioneered discoveries in cell biology. I don’t know if she ever realized how proud he was of her. On September 9, she ended it. She had tried in the past and always been saved. I thought that was well in the past. I was wrong. The neurological storms in her brain would not stop no matter what she tried. I’m thinking about Virginia Woolf, brilliant writer and total pioneer who also had to deal with neurological storms. Who also finally ended it. I’ve been sobbing for days, thinking about how much she must have suffered to make this choice and be so convicted about it (she left a note).

For a while, I sobbed thinking about what I could have done to help, or rather what I didn’t do. But now I realize I might have only delayed it. As I did in the past. The photos are from college days when we shared a loft in Soho where we rehearsed, experimented, held informal performances. It belonged to Trisha Brown’s out-of-town ex-husband and had a dance studio and a large turtle. Anet’s dad Hans took the photos.

In more recent times, she lived in Portland for many years, where she taught, performed, mentored, hosted a performance series, and got involved with Buddhism, blues social dancing, and experimental theater. She was beloved by many and inspired lots of people. I was in shock and still am. Moses Soyer did some paintings of her (one is attached) and one of the two of us. I wonder now what happened to that one.

It is with deep sadness that we share the passing of Anet Margot Ris-Kelman on September 9th. Anet Ris-Kelman was an extraordinary educator, musician, and artist whose presence deeply enriched our Blues dance community. Her creativity, generosity, and dedication touched countless lives, and her absence will be profoundly felt.

I want to speak of this brilliant human who passed last week at 72, but hardly know where to begin. Anet to me (as to many) was a teacher, a mentor, a collaborator, a fellow player and dancer. I first met her around 2011 when she was teaching Kelmanworks, the physical theater modality developed by her late husband Scott, at Hipbone Studio in Portland. In the following years, I was blessed to get to know her in her roles and participation in multiple overlapping creative communities that I was also part of: clown, Butoh, Action Theater improvisation, and her founding and direction of Tiny Theatre PDX.

She was instrumental in me “finding my clown” at the first two clown workshops I ever attended, with Sue Morrison and Giovanni Fussetti. In particular, at Giovanni’s Tao of Clown we were partners in the exercises of bringing out each other’s clown and then performing a duet at the end. In that moment I didn’t actually love that clown; it was too much of an accurate representation/amplification, but in fact it was me and has informed all the performance work i’ve done since. Thank you, Anet.

Later I helped her with the physical building out of Tiny Theater PDX in her home, and she graciously let me perform at some early salons there. In 2017 and 18 we collaborated on creating a couple of multi-act events when we were each working on particular solo characters. i sometimes chafed at her perfectionism and interpersonal style. But the flipside is I learned a lot about the value of serious practice.  And oh to speak of her performances and characters! So brilliant both physically and verbally. Such an incredible, funny, diamond-sharp mind at work!

In recent years she was delightfully a part of the Portland Action Theater Improv practice group i’ve been attending since 2010. In this and other contexts she has long been one of my absolute favorite people to play and duet with. A brilliant embodied mover and player and performer, to me it was always an honor to connect with her in such a setting.

As many also know, she had many challenges including what she called her “episodes” of physio-emotional difficulty. But her way was to meet these times in her own way, in the endless field of creative practice, as well as leaning on trusted friends and allies for support. I hugely respect her way of meeting life including these harder moments. This time she went peacefully onward and though I may wish she hadn’t, I bow to the mystery and her choices.

RIP bright one.

I just learned of the passing of my dear friend Anet Ris-Kelman, an extraordinary creative artist and human being. We met on my first day at NYU Tisch in 1974. There were about 100 students in the dance department, and I remember seeing her in the crowd and thinking, now THERE’S an interesting-looking person. I’d like to be friends with HER!

We became very close over the next few years, when she was exploring the intersection of dance and theater and working with Stephanie Skura, Rudy Perez, and Gus Solomons. Later I visited her when she moved back to Madison (where I met both of her parents), then LA, then Portland, Oregon (where I met her husband, Scott, an experimental theater director, and where she has been performing and teaching ever since.)

While living a continent apart for the past 40 years or so, Anet and I stayed in touch with long annual phone calls. The bond of our friendship was deep; it always felt as if we had last spoken just the day before. We’d catch up on our creative endeavors, our families, our love lives, our health, our demons, the world. There was always a feeling of mutual love, support, and encouragement. Anet was a wonderful, wonderful friend, and I will miss her deeply.

Once, when Anet was visiting us in Ossining, we went for a walk and spotted something unusual in the middle of the road on our way home. I pulled over, and we got out to investigate. It was a lime green Luna moth, a spectacular, colorful moth with a 5″-6″ wingspan. We both marveled at this wonder of nature. It’s the only time I’ve ever seen one, and it made a vivid impression. Anet, may your spirit fly swiftly and freely into the beyond. Thank you for all you have given us and all the lives you have touched.

Dear Friends of Anet,

It is with a heavy heart and tearful eyes that I share the passing of my dear friend Anet Margot Ris-Kelman on September 9, 2025 ~ age 72.

Anet passed peacefully at home during an episode –  as she would call them – with which she had a lifelong struggle. Even in the midst of challenges, her life in this past year held so many blessings. She recently downsized and sold her home, discovered deeper love with her sweetie Wally “Dex” Zialecita, and remained surrounded by art, friendship, and care.

She recently said goodbye to her 16-year-old companion cat, TumTum, who passed gently at home. Just last week, her beloved brother Christopher was able to visit, a final gift of time together.

In her recent days, she was held by her core circle of friends, especially Carla, who has been there over the years.

Anet was my close friend and creative mentor of mine for 12 years. She was dazzling – colorful, daring, insatiably curious. With her, time disappeared.

She taught me to trust the wild pull of creativity, to keep asking why, and to find wonder in the smallest details of life. She leaves quite the legacy behind her. More on that to come…

Anet and Christopher shared an unshakable sibling bond, and he deeply admired her.

Christopher also asks that we share Anet’s story widely through a short video she recorded called Ship Shape – in just four minutes – Anet conveys the essence of her spirit, her journey through her episodes and her longing to finally be at peace.

Dear Anet, we are very sad that you are no longer with us. You were my first cousin, and since I have no siblings, you were always like a substitute sister to me. We fondly remember your visits here in Küsnacht and deeply regret that we only kept in touch with you by telephone in recent years.

We will certainly think of you often.